nathan chow:

1 am: My friend and I met two strangers on the street by smiling and saying hi. We talked to them for a full hour while standing on the sidewalk.

2 am: They went to my friend’s apartment with me to help move her couch down the stairs and outside.

1 pm: They drove us to Goodwill to donate stuff.

2 pm: They took two trips to drive my friend and her mom to the airport.

All within 13 hours of meeting them.

This world is full of good. And strangers are just friends you’ve never met. Believe it. <3

I had my first CouchSurfing experience recently.

CouchSurfing is an online network for strangers to find “couches”—beds, futons, floors—to sleep on during their travels. In general, the program is very safe, but before you host someone or get hosted by someone, you check their list of references and how many other people they know in order to gauge their legitimacy. The site’s philosophy is that travel is not only about locations but also about people. CS “envisions a world where everyone can explore and create meaningful connections with the people and places they encounter.” (If you’re interested in joining, add me as a friend.)

My first guest was Ana, a Spanish student here in the U.S. for just a week. I hosted her for two nights and showed her around Boston. For CSers, one of the most important things to observe in a city is its people and culture. She asked a lot about American life and also pointed out several differences between America and Spain. My favorites:

- Our flag in the Boston Public Library is HUGE, possibly signifying our immense amount of self-love and entitlement. Nowhere in Europe would you find a flag that big.

- Of all the things she saw in Boston, she was possibly most amazed at the big size of my fridge. Fridges and plates of food are twice the size of the ones in Europe. “Could I take a picture of your fridge?!” she asked. I said yes and that often the things you want to show your friends back at home are not photos of the Statue of Liberty or Times Square or whatnot but little cultural and social details like that.

- Americans are awful at being fashionable. No explanation needed.

- When we were eating lunch in Quincy Marketplace, I noticed an attractive young lady sitting next to us, reading a Boston guide. I struck up a conversation with her and found out she was a med student from France and that she was traveling alone for that day. After talking with her for a bit, I told her I was showing Ana around and asked if she would like to join us. She said yes, and for the next few hours, we all toured Boston together, discussed American culture (or lack of), got incredibly wet together, and took photos of each other (Mathilde’s camera malfunctioned right before we met, so she was extra grateful we met her and were able to take photos for her and of her). After we said bye to Mathilde in the evening, Ana asked me, “Meeting someone you don’t know like that is not typical in America, right?” I said “Right.”

(I guess my openness to strangers is not very American. Read http://nathanchow.net/journal/2010/01/27/on-peace-love-and-harmony-part-i-believing/ for how I hitched a car ride from strangers when I was stranded on an island once! It restored my faith in humanity.)

Some of my own reflections on all this:

- I might say I learned as much about my town and country as Ana and Mathilde did. Almost everything they pointed out about America was known to me already, but for some reason, having a foreigner directly say those things to me drilled it into me. When I invited Mathilde on our tour, she correctly pointed out that I got to see things I normally don’t see in my town (I went on the Freedom Trail for my first time!). But on a deeper level, it’s as if I see my own town through Spanish and French eyes now. Marcel Proust: “The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

- Saying good-bye to Mathilde and Ana made me feel as if I were one of the characters in the films “Before Sunrise” and “Before Sunset.” This first CouchSurfing experience, along with welcoming another stranger to join my “tour,” really was about human connection. If I were to describe CS: You meet someone you might never see again, but you know you have a few days—or a few hours—to connect. You let them into your home, you step into theirs. You teach them, you learn from them. You do all this while knowing that shortly after hello is the threat of good-bye. It doesn’t matter. What happens between hi and bye is what matters—it’s yours, it’s theirs, it’s shared. And it’s kept forever.

Some special thanks: <3

- Leanne: (I just met her because she was a fan of one of my blogs.) I had a wonderful conversation with you and Ana on Ana’s first night here. Thanks for coming over so late on a Sunday night! More food adventures and dares to follow..

- Kayla H.: Thanks for stopping by! I rarely get to see you anymore. Put on your coat! We will finish our barter soon.. and possibly add more to it lol.

- Rossella and Sima: Thanks for introducing me to CouchSurfing!

- Sima and Weronika: Thanks for your very well-kept and frequently updated blogs on Spain. Some of the things I talked to Ana about were inspired by your posts!

- Paul: Thank you for allowing me to bring Ana over!

These lists will be updated as I think of more. The items are in no particular order.

By the End of My Life:

• I want to have made every decision I ever wanted to make and have no regrets about the past.

• I want to have left something behind that outlives my life and that continues to make a difference in the world (mainly my teachings, films, writings, and future children).

• I want to have left the world a much more loving, compassionate, understanding, and forgiving place.

• I want to have found laughter and beauty everywhere possible.

• I want to have given everything I could’ve given in all my years on earth.

Promises to an Older Self:

• To always fill my room and office with mementos of loved ones (whether photos of them or cards and letters from them)–NOT diplomas, degrees, and awards. My greatest pride is in the love I have given and the love that has been given to me, not in my achievements and titles. Framed plaques don’t fully symbolize the ways I grew or capture my fondest memories. That credit always belongs to the people I’ve met along the way.

• To continue being curious about the world, life, and the people around me. To continue to read and write. To continue to teach and learn.

• To know that when I come home from work really tired and my kids rush towards me and nearly pull me down to the floor with their excitement, that these moments won’t last for long and that I should cherish the few years they’ll be doing that.

• To romance my wife in old age. To be content and appreciative of our changed type of love but still pursue her as if we were dating. Every day, to make her feel as loved as ever and desirable beyond measure.

• For my wife and I to be that set of grandparents whose gentleness, wisdom, and stories make kids wonder where we get our sense of caregiving from.

• For my wife and I to be that couple whose laughter, adventure, and joy of life make people wonder where we get our energy from.

• To continue to tell everyone what they’ve meant to my life and to continue to hear what I’ve meant to their lives.

• To continue to remind myself every day that the greatest gift the world gives me is the awareness that I will have to die someday. With that, I make my life as full of peace, love, and happiness as possible and I make my existence as full of purpose as possible and as much of a legacy as possible.

By Nathan S. Chow

————————————–

Peace. Love. Kindness. Goodness. Unity. Harmony.

Do you believe in them?

————————————–

I was stranded on an island over the summer.

After a job interview on Long Island, I wanted to explore the area for a few hours, so I took a bus to the nearby Fire Island to take photos.

When I was done, I walked back to the bus stop but saw the last bus of the evening already driving to the long bridge back to Long Island.

There I stood, alone at the edge of a quickly emptying visitor parking lot, as the sun was already setting and everyone was heading home. I had only two choices:

1. Walk the 6 miles back to the Long Island train station I had to be at.
2. Call a taxi company so I could pay the hefty sum for someone to get me off that island.

I looked at the parking lot behind me and saw a dozen cars remaining. The last few visitors were leaving.

In the spur of the moment, I reminded myself I could always depend on one of my deepest faiths: human kindness. I decided to create a third way back: I would ask for a ride from a complete stranger.

I noticed a large family with one of its members packing their car as the rest of them were still using the nearby visitor bathroom. I approached the one packing the car. I crossed my fingers.

“Hi, are you heading back to Long Island? I missed the last bus back and was wondering if you would just drop me off at the train station.”

He looked at me, seemed to kinda examine and gauge me for a while, as if—obviously as if—no one in this country ever asks for these kinds of favors.

But then his face softened at the opportunity. “Sure,” he said, “but the rest of my family isn’t ready yet. Come on over to meet them. What’s your name?”

There it was. The first stranger I asked said yes.

That family was incredibly open to accommodating me. After telling them I was visiting from Boston, they offered to drive me all the way back to Manhattan for my bus ride back to Boston (but I insisted I already bought a round-trip Long Island train ticket and that dropping me off at the nearby train station would be enough). Then they told me to take out my train map to make sure I indeed knew how to get back. And finally, when we got to the station, they even waited with me and chatted with me at the platform until I was safely on the right train.

But not only were they so accommodating, but they were also genuinely interested in me as a person. They treated me as if I were part of their family, asking me about my job interview, my career aspirations, and my missions in life. I was more than a stranger to them. They trusted me, listened to me, and befriended me—all while bringing me closer to home.

————————————–

Do we forget that kindness and goodness exist in this world?

The news and media have not only programmed us to pick up on just the negatives of human nature no matter how big or small, but they have also led us to believe that a world devoid of love is natural and inevitable. Their stories constantly warn us: Another murderer on the loose. War—still the only medium of exchange between countries. Be careful in your hometown. Be careful abroad. Don’t trust anyone. They’re all out to get you.

Is the world really that much of an ugly one and nothing more?

While everything shown in journalism may be real and while it may be a necessary evil dutifully warning us about dangers and threats, too much is left out. The big problem with journalism is not that its stories are not objective enough but that choosing which stories to tell will always be subjective.

True, cruelty and harshness exist in this world and yes, we must be aware of that, but if you look at the world with your own eyes and resist the lens that the cult of negative media wants you to wear, I think you’ll see that—although it often slips under the radar and is rarely publicized—kindness exists in this world; you’ll see that love—unlike loud and faceless hate—is often quiet and individualized; and you’ll see that we humans—at the very least—are capable of loving and being loved in return.

My friend Sidney Efromovich, the founder of Boston University’s Hug Don’t Hate organization, once said, “If you ever need to think outside the box, simply think into your heart; because your heart was never constrained by boxes.”

Imagine me again, stranded on that island.

Do I believe in love and kindness?

If I didn’t, I had two choices: walk or take a cab.

If I did, I could create new choices: ask for a ride, ask for money for a cab, call the bus company to explain my situation, knock on a local house to ask to stay the night, and much more.

Cynics laugh at these.

————————————–

The documentary God Grew Tired of Us tells the story of the “lost boys of Sudan”—the term given to the 30,000 who fled their war-torn country by foot during the Second Sudanese Civil War. In 2001, nearly 4,000 of them were invited by the United States and the International Rescue Committee to resettle in America.

The film follows the lives of three of these lost boys, showing their initial sense of confusion, amazement, and wonder as they grow accustomed to things we have in America that they never even knew existed: electricity, running water, public transportation, supermarkets, readily available food.

But even though they quickly become familiar with our technology, they never feel acclimated to our social lifestyle. Their grueling hours at work prevent them from spending quality time with friends. They can never say hello to a neighbor without getting weird looks. They feel utterly baffled at how they must watch out for theft and murder every time they step out their door.

Despite all the conveniences and opportunities in America, the lost boys of Sudan long for their home country, where villages are true communities, where locks do not exist, and where wandering strangers are invited into their huts, fed, and welcomed to stay.

If refugees want to go home to their war-torn country rather than stay in the world’s greatest superpower, what does that say about us?

Aren’t we the ones who got ourselves lost? Aren’t we the ones who are displaced from true humanity, true community? Aren’t we the ones who constantly seek refuge?

The joke’s on us. Still laughing?

————————————–

If, somewhere in the world, there exists a community so open to love, why can’t it exist here too?

If, sometime in your life, there existed a person so open to love, why can’t the stranger next to you be like that too?

We were all raised differently, we have all been exposed to different experiences, we have all learned different social etiquette.

But we’re all human, right? We were all born with the same capacity to love and be loved in return, right?

—————————————-

Many people are starting to claim that “Love” is their religion. But what do they mean?

Do they only preach about it and pray for it? Or have they actually taken—as Kierkegaard once coined—a “leap to faith” to truly, deeply believe in the existence of love?

If a stranger asked them for a ride, would they give it? If they needed a ride from a stranger, would they ask for it?

If a stranger asked them if they could stay in their house, would they grant it? If they needed to stay at a stranger’s house, would they ask for it?

Are there different levels of faith in this religion called love? Are there different denominations of it too—some more focused on giving, some more focused on receiving, some more focused on preaching and praying, some more unafraid of doing?

Does it matter? Is that okay? Are they all still believers? I do not know.

But this I know: Every year America gives us a thicker, cloudier, and more cynical pair of glasses to see the world, and every year it takes that much more faith—that much more of a bigger leap—to take them off and throw them down, to step on them and crunch them, to want to approach every brand new stranger we see by leaning in, squinting at them, and recognizing in their individual, unique face that they, too, are human and that they, too, are capable of loving and being loved in return.

Saint Augustine said “Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe.”

If we crunch our glasses and approach every stranger blindly, if we believe in love, kindness, and harmony despite the murderer on the loose and despite the ongoing wars, if we have faith in what is seemingly not there and not newsworthy, it is only then that we will start to see what we all secretly want to see, and it is only then that our hearts will open up to others and other hearts will open up to us, and it is only then that we will have enough hope to believe that the hate, discord, and cruelty we have been programmed to see does not need to be our natural course.

—————————————-

Do you believe in peace, love, kindness, goodness, unity, and harmony?

It’s not about believing what we always see and hear. It’s about leaping and believing what we RARELY see and hear.

It’s not about denying and ignoring the existence of hate, discord, and cruelty. It’s about being faithful enough to believe peace, love, and harmony exist DESPITE anything that even resembles their ugly opposites.

It’s not about debating whether we are good or bad in our natural state. It’s about recognizing that all of us want love and peace in our CURRENT state.

It’s not about preaching and praying—we have more than enough of that. It’s about participating and performing—we need EVERYONE for that.

It’s not about resigning to safe neutrality and painstaking precaution. It’s about embracing blind positivity and undying, RELENTLESS love.

It’s not about giving up and saying most our hearts are already bruised and corrupted. It’s about giving in and saying ALL HEARTS, no matter how beaten, can still beat.

—————————————-

The naive are not the ones who believe love can exist but the ones who believe that hate is all that is possible.

Not one of us can say we have never had negative feelings, but each one of us can say we have the capacity to love and be loved in return.

Let us not—for even one second—cynically believe that our negative feelings will always turn into negative actions and let us not—for even one second—safely assume that our positive feelings will always turn into positive actions.

Feelings are natural, actions are not.

It is because of actions that we see that people are good, people are bad, and that peace exists, war exists.

Neither is natural, neither is inevitable.

Never has the whole human population believed in one side or acted on one side. The world has always been balanced on a see-saw where neither peace, love, and harmony nor hate, discord, and cruelty have completely taken over, whether in our beliefs or in our actions.

But one CAN win over the other.

And it has always been up to us today to decide which way the world will sway.

.
.
.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“On Peace, Love, and Harmony” is a three-part series written by the writer, filmmaker, and teacher Nathan S. Chow (http://nathanchow.net).

This article is the first part.

While believing world peace is possible is a crucial first step towards it, it is not enough. We must also do.

~~~ In Part II: Interbeing, Giving, and Receiving, find out how we humans are one and how we need to give and receive freely in order to keep love alive.

~~~ In Part III: Marching Inward and Onward, find out how we need to think small and change OUR world in order to change THE world.

These articles will be cross-posted to http://oncewelive.com, a collection of letters on peace, love, and happiness.

If you enjoyed this series, please share it! Thank you! =)

Love Always <3,
Nathan

Two one-armed men looked at each other and realized that together was the only way they could ever clap again.

Today my roommate’s best friend complimented me in a way I hadn’t heard in a while when she said my voice is “very calm and soothing” and that it puts her “at ease.”

I’m not really sure how much I believe what I say in the next few passages, but I’m just gonna toy with an idea:

Few people compliment others’ voices. It’s always clothes, accessories, and hair styles that we notice and can easily make statements about. But after thinking about the compliment I had just received and how it was in line with my personality (or at least how I think of myself), I realized how accurate of a judgment you can make of someone just by listening to their voice.

Actions depend on circumstance and setting, clothes depend on fashion sense, and posture sometimes depends on just how comfortable it is. But voice stays relatively consistent. At big social gatherings, I can very easily act crazy and be an attention whore, while in classrooms, I am often an obedient and reserved teacher’s pet. Obviously I would raise my voice at a party, but whether party or classroom, I think my voice pretty much stays the same. Other ways of judging me may be accurate every now and then, but judging me by voice gives you a picture of the core of my personality.

Think of some of your friends and what their voices say about them. Is the voice soft, loud, weak, powerful, energetic, lively, monotone, blah, fast, slow, rushed, calm, shrill, piercing, stuttered, overly formal?

Compliment them! Even if someone’s voice has a traditionally “negative” quality to it, it probably says something positive about the person’s character. A weak voice probably means a chill personality. A piercing voice probably means a fun personality. Point it out and your friend may be pleasantly surprised by something few people notice about them!

I haven’t been to an airport in more than half a decade.. and in my four years at BU and in Boston, never have I ever been to Logan Airport (a fact that a lot of my friends who live far away find hard to grasp). That changed at the end of August.

My first visit to Logan was when a few friends and I (and especially Sima) surprised Katie there. My second was when I wanted to see Giselle there when she landed (even though I got there later than her plane.. haha).

My visits to the airport reminded me of the ending of the film Love Actually—that “love actually is all around.” Maybe my friends who fly often have grown used to them, but I thought the arrival gates were really exciting places to be. Giselle’s flight came in really late, but Katie’s came in at around 11 pm.. and I was still able to see lots of family members and friends reunite with each other.

I’ve been to few airports in my life, but after my most recent visits, I think I’ll vote them the number one place to see the happiest hugs. I really wish people gave hugs like that every time they saw each other and every time they said good-bye.

Yes, I truly believe love actually is all around. But I wish we were open to showing it more often—on a day-to-day basis, not just an airport arrival and departure basis.

Dear Friends,

This is it. My last memories note at BU and the final farewell.

After four years of writing these and after thinking that college couldn’t possibly get any better, all of you managed to prove me wrong. The last four years have been more amazing than I ever asked for, but you’ve really outdone it this time by making my last semester the most memorable.

Just like my traditional end-of-the-semester note, I’ll start off with a list of memories I was fortunate enough to share with you in the Spring of 2009. Most of you were tagged in this note because I spent enough time with you this semester to live, laugh, learn, and have fun together through these moments.

After listing the memories, I’ll also have a special thanks and superlatives section for my whole four years at BU.

And last, but certainly not least, I’ll end with some final farewell words. All of you were tagged in this note because you were an important part of my BU experience at some point and I would like to thank you for it in the final farewell section. These four years would not have been the same without you.

Buuut.. that comes last. Here are the Spring 2009 memories first:

— Spring 2009 Memories —

(roughly in chronological order)

- Living on the 6th floor of Myles. The floormates I’ve met so far: Teddy, Angus, Connie L., Kristin N., Brittany W., Meagan L., Laura A., Jill O., Bridget, Shara, Ryan S., Justin, Ken C., Monika T., Tiffany H., Kerry, Gabrielle J., Davide N., Bianey, Ljubica, Stephanie R., Victor M., Sang-Hyup, Greg H., Rohan J., and of course our RAs Adanta and Johnny F.

- The New York City trip with Sarah W. and Marisa during Winter Break. The Ukrainian Restaurant. Our free admission to the New Museum of Contemporary Art. Strand Bookstore. Riding the L Train back and forth half a dozen times!!

- All the board game nights.. with too many people to name.
- Cranium friendship drama between Sarah and Mariana lol.
- Big Taboo and harassing Bendy Bob.
- How Chandler and I should never be partners in any game.
- Meeting Sumita randomly in LateNite with Brian B.
- The Mafia game in which Sarah W. was on a killing spree.
- All my predictable responses in Poser.
- Weird guessing games with Karen W., Ashley M., and others.

- All the salsa dancing nights at MIT Salsa Dance Socials, Mambos, or BU.
- Mostly with Gretchen, Elissa, Giselle, Katie C., Kimrey, Mike C., Diego, Jackie A., Stephanie R., Stephanie S., Ankita, Nishita, Conrad, Sabrina G., Cristina, Maria M., Francesca, Sandy O., Jose E., Trevor P., and many others.
- The scarf adventure I had with Gretchen walking back from the MIT Winter Salsa Gala.
- The move I invented with Elissa at Mambos.
- Trying to dance while being tickled by Katie C.. lol

- After a year of not seeing her.. Reunion with Hyesung!!!
- Catching up on everything that happened in the past year.

- Irma’s wild birthday party with Maria C., Stephanie C., Camilo, Liz K., Fernando R., and many others.

- Chinese New Year Party at the Howard Thurman Center. My juggling performance while Sarah A. and Kathleen H. played music.

- Tricking Shakeela into thinking I have a Chinese accent.. hahaha!!

- The Back Bay Ball with Nichole F., Gabrielle J., Christine G., Gretchen, and Kimrey. (Even though I swear the guy-girl ratio at BU isn’t 1:5.)

- My birthday!!
- Allie and Laura Anne’s surprise penis cupcake for me in the dining hall. Their humping bunny and “How to Talk Dirty in Every Language” gifts for me.. hahaha.
- Sunset Cantina with Giselle, Matt R., Pat U., Yue, Mike C., Maria C., Sean P., and Carolyn the Dancing Robot Garcia.
- Hanging out in the Spanish House afterwards. Tucking Jacqueline L. into bed.. lol.
- The nearly 200 birthday wishes that flooded my Facebook wall!! Thank you!

- The Redstone Film Festival with Giselle, as Chang and Isabella sat nearby.

- Stephanie S.’s Valentine’s Day Party. Kate M. on the floor.. lol.

- The BU Pub with Maria C., Stephanie C., Betsy, Irma, Sean P., and Becca.

- The January-February birthday party at the Spanish House!!
- Our change in location.. to a more crowded dance floor?
- All my funny gifts and cards. The photos I took with Mike’s gift lol.

- The cute girl who kept following me at Shaw’s and who I finally talked to in the gum aisle.. hehe.

- Hakim and Francis’ Pajama Party with Giselle, Katie C., Gretchen, Elissa, Cristina, Bethany, Jamesy, Barbra, Vaughn, and others.
- Connect 4. Dance Partyyy.

- Having my sexuality being debated on JuicyCampus.com!! hahahaha (Although I have a feeling I wasn’t supposed to have found it entertaining.)

- SPRING BREAK IN MAINE AND QUEBEC!!!!!!!!
- With Sima, Mike, Conrad, Kimrey, Gretchen, Navin, and Brian B.
- Lighthouses, coastline, and sightseeing.
- Our super nice and cheap apartment in Quebec City.
- Croissant jokes in a French accent.
- Ferry ride. Titanic scene re-enactment with Gretchen! lol
- Truth or dare game. The most memorable dares: pants, peanut butter, upside-down, hair gel.
- The prank that Gretchen and I pulled on Kimrey!! Most amazing thing ever looool
- Menage-a-trois!!!
- The Frontenac
- Snow fights, chocolate wars, tickle wars, wrestling wars in bed, soccer in mud and ice, fights for the shower (not to be confused with shower fights).
- Montreal: Gay Village, the Olympic Stadium, the Biodome, clubbing at St. Winston Churchill’s.
- Philosophical talk with Mike and Kimrey until 7 am.
- Pickle surprise!!!
- My competition with Mike in getting hit by Kimrey and Gretchen.
- Mmmm Maine lobster.
- Shortbus.. lol
- All my blonde moments.

- Chris H.’s surprise birthday dinner at Papa Razzi with Brea, Mark C., Michelle G., Raja, and others. Everyone using their camera to take candid paparazzi photos of each other.

- Oh Henry…

- Juggling Association memories:
- With Andrew L., Michi, Victor C., Tim D., David B., Alex W., Peter Panic, and others
- My solo performance at the Alice in FitRec Land special exhibit.
- Teaching Diego to juggle in an hour!
- BU Juggling’s hot date with Habitat for Humanity during their Sleepout. We helped them promote their cause, while they helped us get some publicity too!
- BU Beach juggling.
- Juggling for the Shelton BBQ Dinner.

- Ice skating with Nichole, who tried teaching me figure skating moves. Learning the two-feet spin.

- Kill/Marry/Screw game with Sarah W., Mariana, and Brian B. It was revealed that I’d rather do a meat grinder than a certain girl who likes me…

- Hakim’s 21st birthday party at the Dugout with Francis P., Andrew J., Barbra, Abbey, and others.

- Rossella’s BU visit!
- Our subsequent late-night Facebook chat conversations.

- Plays/musicals I saw:
- “The Year of Magical Thinking” at the Lyric Stage Theater
- “Hamlet” featuring Laura Anne and Sarah G.!
- “Hair” by BU On Broadway

- The Myles oil spill and our evacuation. Seeking refuge in Katie’s room in the Spanish House lol.

- All my Tuesday man dates with Mike C. in Towers.

- My family’s visit to Boston and my sister Jasmine’s stay at BU.
- Arnold Arboretum to take pictures of flowers.
- Poser board game with Jasmine and others. How everyone thought my answers and Jasmine’s were so similar in their inappropriateness.
- Maluken Japanese restaurant with Jasmine, Kimrey, Mike C., and Gretchen.
- North End and Mike’s Pastry with Jasmine, Giselle, Sarah W., and Marisa.

- The Irish step-dancing event by BU’s Step About Boston! Ceili dance with Kelley, Liz K., Maddie, Kerry M., and others. Advance, retreat, spin. Advance, retreat, spin. Repeat, repeat, repeat.. until dizzy.

- Agganis Arena to watch the televised ice hockey championship game between BU and Miami University of Ohio!
- With Elissa, Mohamed, Abdullah, Stephanie R., Stephanie S., Ankita, Nishita, and others.
- Free ice skating while the game was on the Jumbotron.
- BU scored TWO goals in the very last minute to tie a 3-1 deficit… then scored the game-winning goal in overtime to be the national champions!!
- The celebration parade with Yue. The day was officially declared by Boston’s Mayor Menino as Terrier Day.

- Multicultural Weekend!!
- My super outgoing and enthusiastic guest Xavier N. All his salsa skillzz.
- Jokes with Xavier, Veronica B., Nichole L., and Lisette at the reception and at Shelton Late Nite when Abdullah joined us.
- Jamba Juice, Mafia, and squirrels.
- The big dinner table at Myles with hosts, guests, and some of my Spanish House friends. Brian’s ways of getting back at me while he had to be silent. Bruk’s 3 questions for me about anything.
- Jammin Thursday. Then the Friday dance party with hosts, guests, and Gretchen and Andrew B.

- The lunch with Kimrey in Warren when we put a “Reserved for Cute Girls” sign on the table next to us lol.

- Apartment hunting with Paul T., with the help of Ulrich, our real estate agent. (Let me know if you would like his services! For real estate, that is.)

- Watching the Boston Marathon with Gretchen!
- Walking to Copley to see the finish line.
- Rooting for Oscar and Dr. Bob.. haha. The two guys dressed up as red beer cups.
- Seeing my friend Eve running!

- The BU Pub with Pat and his six awesome lady friends. Senior talk. The blinking version of Mafia.

- Spontaneous midnight soccer with Marisa, Sarah W., Stephanie S., Ankita, and Nishita!!
- Bike-riding with Giselle and Abdullah. “Showering” at the sprinklers.

- Trying to keep in touch with Kayla Celeste, Erin M., Amy S., Titi, and Katie K. while they were abroad! (And I’m still looking forward to the next time I’ll see them!)

— Nom Nom Nom —

- Chinese New Year’s Eve at Shanghai Gate with Yue, Will F., Lily, Hyesung, Giselle, and Matt R.

- Homemade pasta, pizza, and mozzarella sticks at Matt R.’s place with Giselle, Afra, Paul T., and Liz K.

- Shabu Shabu hotpot restaurant with Yue, Giselle, Nayeli, Tucker, and Patrick

- Fin’s Japanese Restaurant with Chang.

- Ghetto dinners with Vaughn, Janella, Karen Z., Eliza, Mia, and others.

- Myles dinners and lunches with Laura Anne, Magie, Francis, Wei, Christian A., Maria P., Sophia, Anthia, and others.

- Unplanned dinners and chats with Lamies!

— My Courses this Semester —

COM FT 554 E1: Films of Yasujiro Ozu, with Prof. Ray Carney

- All of Prof. Carney’s inspirational tidbits for artists, based on all his famous books, essays, and articles.

CAS PS 367 A1: Industrial-Organizational Psychology, with Prof. Perlitsh

- Being the supervisor of the most awesome work team in the “organization.” Our group drawing!

- The marshmallow and snack jokes Steve and I had with the professor on the first day of organizational socialization.

CAS HI 102 A1: Emerging Modern Europe, with Prof. Backman

- My office hour chat with the TA Kathryn about the challenges and rewards of teaching.

CAS LC 112 E1: Second Semester Chinese, with Chen Laoshi and Tadd Laoshi

- Sarah A.’s hilarious comments throughout the semester! Our xiao gou jokes.

- The “Your mama” jokes that our teacher Tadd Laoshi encouraged in the oral drill session.

- Trying to memorize a 4-page freshly written script in an hour with Sarah A. lol.

SED SE 534 A1: Classroom Management for Special Education, with Kevin Koziol

- Kevin’s cheesy jokes!

- My group project with Shara and Noah.

CAS PS 572 A1: Psychology of Women, with Prof. Costos

- Giving the guy perspective on topics related to gender socialization, relationships, and media images of women.

- My encore role-play performance of Bruce the misogynist.

— Special Thanks Throughout the Four Years —

- All my professors and teachers for all the things they’ve taught me not only about academics but about life, growth, and meaning.

- My RAs: Chris, Nicolae, Aisha, Adanta, and Johnny.

- The coordinators of the Admissions Day and Overnight Program from my sophomore year until this year. This year’s: Seth, Eve, and Freddy. Thanks for recognizing all my contributions throughout the past 3 years at the closing party!

- The Chinese Students Association E-board (including Erika L. and Angela C.) for all the Chinese cultural events.

- The Alianza Latina E-board (including Francesca and Sandy O.) for all the Latino events and dance parties.

- My fellow E-board members of BU Juggling for helping to run such a smooth club the past 2 years.

- Everyone at The English High School during my media arts teaching internship this year.
- Mr. Rozas for being a great role model of a media teacher.
- All my students (including Anis, Gerardo, Philip, Natalie, Giselle S., and Kev) for indirectly teaching me about what works and what doesn’t work in guiding and building their interests in self-expression, their competency in media arts, and their confidence in their strengths.

— Superlatives Throughout the Four Years: Faculty —

Favorite professors:
- Prof. Burak (COM201)
- Ms. McHugh (Creative Writing)
- Prof. Cavalieri (Video Production)
- Prof. Donley (Writing)
- Prof. Hall (Film Criticism)
- Jan Egleson (Film Directing)
- Frank Capria (Video Post-Production)
- Prof. Costos (Social Psych Experimental; Psych of Women)
- Prof. Bernstein (Scandinavian Cinema; Porn Studies.. yes, really)
– Prof. Perlitsh (Industrial-Organizational Psych)
- Prof. Carney (Art and the Films of Ozu)

Smartest and most inspirational professor:
- Prof. Carney

Funniest professor (and possibly funniest person):
- Frank Capria

Favorite professors to keep in touch with:
- Prof. Donley
- Prof. Hall
- Prof. Costos

Favorite security guard:
- Terry (Myles on Sunday afternoons)

Favorite dining hall worker:
- Enoch (Warren Towers omelette guy)

Favorite janitor:
- John (Sleeper Hall a few years ago)

— Superlatives Throughout the Four Years: Other —

Favorite places to relax:
- bookstores: BU’s Barnes & Noble and the Borders on Boylston St.
- my bed

Favorite places to study:
- the dining hall
- my bed

Favorite places to hang out:
- just the typical dinner in a dining hall (I think the amount of fun you can have during a meal interaction is underestimated)
- the Spanish House (especially Katie, Gretchen, and Kimrey’s room.. and ESPECIALLY when they try to kick me out at 2 am.. lol)
- the FitRec for soccer (that was only when I lived at West)
- Myles Bradford Lounge for board games
- the BU Beach for juggling
- my bed

Favorite places to dance:
- Mambos for salsa/merengue
- MIT salsa socials
- Ned Devine’s Irish Pub and Club (Carolyn’s birthday!)
- Alianza Latina’s dance parties
- on the street!!

Favorite walking routes:
- the Esplanade
- Newbury Street
- the Harvard Bridge aka the Mass Ave Bridge

Favorite famous people I met:
- Barack Obama!! (I was 2 inches away from him)
- Phillip Lopate (writer, essayist, and critic).. he was hilarious in a film critic panel discussion
- Elie Wiesel (Holocaust survivor, Nobel Peace Prize winner, author of “Night”)
- Jason Alexander (Seinfeld)
- Frank McCourt (Pulitzer Prize-winning author of “Angela’s Ashes”)

Procrastination at its best:
- 10-page paper written in 3.5 hours about a book I skimmed (and I got an A-)
- 3-page paper written in 1.5 hours for a 500-level class with some grad students (and the professor made me read it to the whole class after giving me an A)
- 42-page partner paper written in 17 hours from 8 pm one day to 3 pm the next with one bathroom break and one 2.5 hour class to attend during that time (about 27 pages were newly written; 15 were heavily revised from old drafts) (we got an A-/B+)

Favorite film projects:
- “Ms. Boston University” BUTV series with Al, James Phillips, Amanda D., other crew, and the 12 personable, charismatic, gorgeous, and fun contestants
- “Forgive Us Our Trespasses” – short film with Garytt, Johnna, Jon H., and all our amazing actors
- “Juggling 1 2 3″ – my editing project for a 500-level post-production class.. just because the prof gave me an A- without knowing I shot it on a 3.2 MP digital camera’s video mode and edited it on Windows MovieMaker
- “Pierced” – my two-actor film about sexual tensions; starring Kelley and Jim R. (thanks again for all your help!)

Favorite writing projects:
- “My High School Through Lemons”: my memoir about my underprivileged high school. I was one of 4 out of 400 students to be chosen to read a memoir at the Coffeehouse Reading for the next semester’s COM201 students.
- How to Spell College (http://howtospellcollege.com): my blog for practical college advice presented in a hip and humorous style; it’s semi-famous on college discussion boards.
- Once We Live (http://oncewelive.com): my newly launched blog for inspirations in peace, love, and happiness. Thank you sooo much for all your words of encouragement whenever I cross-post entries on Facebook notes!

— Superlatives Throughout the Four Years: Friends —

Favorite people to bump into:
- Pat U. (especially nowadays when I rarely see him!)
- Bianey R. (the friendliest person in Myles!!)
- Brandon P. (because it’s always when he’s headed to the gym or when he’s in Myles visiting anyone but me)

Most social and outgoing / Knows everyone:
- Andrew J.
- Pat U.
- Justin W.
- Titi
- Francesca
- Jacqueline L.
- Sid E.
- Brandon P.

Has done the most for BU:
- Sid and Bruna for promoting understanding and tolerance through Hug Don’t Hate
- Lauren S. for leading BU’s chapter of UNICEF
- Hakim for pushing for a more diverse campus through the Admissions Student Diversity Board
- Noah W. for all his community service work
- Pat U. just for being super-friendly to everyone, getting people to interact, and all the small but meaningful things that resumes can’t capture

Best senses of humor:
- Carolyn G.
- Mike C.
- Brian B.
- Abdullah
- Aziz Alawadhi
- Teja

Best cooks:
- Matt R. (pasta, pizza, and mozzarella sticks)
- Conrad (baked goods!)

Best athletes:
- My friends on the men’s soccer team: Sammy A., Jin, Petur, Jon J., Jason L., Temi
- Basketball: Ibrahim K.

Most artistic:
- Kristin W. (visual arts)
- Laura P. (visual arts)
- Ariana A. (photography)
- Josh M. (photography)
- Giselle (photography)
- Jude (music)
- David G. (theater)
- Sandy S. (writing/poetry)

Best dancers:
- Paul T. (standard ballroom. have you seen the awards he’s won?)
- Gretchen (salsa, swing)
- Diego (salsa)
- Xavier N. (salsa)
- Dana S. (ballet)
- Kelley (Irish step dancing)
- Connie (hip hop)

Favorite people to discuss academics with:
- Becca (anything)
- Marisa (women’s studies)
- Afra (anything)
- Alex G. (film and art)
- Chang (film)
- Kelly G. (theater)
- Francisco S. (philosophy)

Most entertaining classmates:
- Sarah A. in Chinese class!! (”An Shanran”.. hahaha)
- Jon H.

Favorite people to eat with:
- Giselle!! (because she takes her time even more than I do)
- Miguel (oh how I miss weekend “breakfasts” with you at 4 pm)
- Hyesung (especially because of our talks during meals)

Favorite people to hug:
- Laura Anne and Allie!!
- Sid (of course.. he’s the founder and President of Hug Don’t Hate)
- Carolyn G.

Weirdest ways I met friends:
- She killed me in a game of Assassins organized by the Myles RHA. (Sarah W.)
- She slammed a door in my face. (Kaitlin C.)
- I found her wallet. (Kerry E.)
- I offered to help open her mailbox.. and then I ran away with her care package. (Laura Anne)

— The Final Farewell —

All of you were tagged in this note because regardless of how often I saw you this semester, you were still a very special part of my whole BU experience at one point or another—whether I met you at orientation or in the past few weeks. It’s not about how many times you can find your name in any of my memories notes, how many times we hung out, or how many times I even bumped into you. It’s about how big of an impression you’ve left on me.