nathan chow:

These lists will be updated as I think of more. The items are in no particular order.

By the End of My Life:

• I want to have made every decision I ever wanted to make and have no regrets about the past.

• I want to have left something behind that outlives my life and that continues to make a difference in the world (mainly my teachings, films, writings, and future children).

• I want to have left the world a much more loving, compassionate, understanding, and forgiving place.

• I want to have found laughter and beauty everywhere possible.

• I want to have given everything I could’ve given in all my years on earth.

Promises to an Older Self:

• To always fill my room and office with mementos of loved ones (whether photos of them or cards and letters from them)–NOT diplomas, degrees, and awards. My greatest pride is in the love I have given and the love that has been given to me, not in my achievements and titles. Framed plaques don’t fully symbolize the ways I grew or capture my fondest memories. That credit always belongs to the people I’ve met along the way.

• To continue being curious about the world, life, and the people around me. To continue to read and write. To continue to teach and learn.

• To know that when I come home from work really tired and my kids rush towards me and nearly pull me down to the floor with their excitement, that these moments won’t last for long and that I should cherish the few years they’ll be doing that.

• To romance my wife in old age. To be content and appreciative of our changed type of love but still pursue her as if we were dating. Every day, to make her feel as loved as ever and desirable beyond measure.

• For my wife and I to be that set of grandparents whose gentleness, wisdom, and stories make kids wonder where we get our sense of caregiving from.

• For my wife and I to be that couple whose laughter, adventure, and joy of life make people wonder where we get our energy from.

• To continue to tell everyone what they’ve meant to my life and to continue to hear what I’ve meant to their lives.

• To continue to remind myself every day that the greatest gift the world gives me is the awareness that I will have to die someday. With that, I make my life as full of peace, love, and happiness as possible and I make my existence as full of purpose as possible and as much of a legacy as possible.

I made a few additions to last year’s note:

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!

Tonight (January 25th) is New Year’s Eve, often celebrated by a big feast with family and friends. In fact, as hundreds of millions of Asians travel to see their relatives, the period around Chinese New Year is considered the largest human migration.

The Chinese Zodiac cycles through 12 years, each one associated with an animal. Tomorrow marks the first day of the new year of the ox.

The famous phrase “Gung Hay Fat Choy,” which most people use to mean “Happy New Year” actually literally translates to “Congratulations and Be Prosperous.” According to an ancient myth, the Nian monster (which translates to Year) looked like an ugly dragon and liked to eat people and livestock but was afraid of the color red, loud sounds, and light.

When people were lucky enough to survive another cold winter and another Nian and Year, they were congratulated. Over time, traditions to start off the new year have evolved. Today they include scaring off evil spirits and Nian by wearing red, passing out lucky red envelopes with money, lighting loud firecrackers, and leaving the lights on for the first night of the year–all activities the Nian monster would be afraid of.

Also, to symbolize a fresh start in the days leading up to the New Year, the Chinese get new haircuts, buy new clothes, and clean their houses.

Unlike the Western New Year, in which people make resolutions and try to be more proactive in the days following the new year, in the Chinese New Year, we simply ask the precious spirits of dead ancestors for blessings, including good health and prosperity. Then we hope for the best.

While proactivity is for the whole year and not just the start of the year, some Chinese, especially the Buddhists, also understand that some things are just meant to be and shouldn’t be bothered with. We can ask for the best and work towards it, but we are content with whatever we are given. There are few things more worthy of gratefulness than surviving another year and still being on this beautiful planet.

So to all my friends who celebrate Chinese New Year or any other Lunar New Year, I wish you all the best blessings possible.

Be healthy. Be prosperous. Be happy. Be hopeful. But most of all: Be grateful.

Enjoy the new year!!!!!!!!

(And yes, that would be a lucky 8 exclamation points.)

Love Always,
Nathan

P.S. Sorry I couldn’t tag everyone! I tried to switch it up a bit with who I tagged this year.

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i usually get through everything in life fine. you can throw anything at me, and either i’ll have the strength and endurance to fight it or i’ll have the attitude to not care about it. but even if i got through this week, i’ll have to admit that it was one of the roughest i’ve ever had – rough enough to leave me scarred.

i had a test monday; a paper due wednesday; a quiz wednesday; a project to prepare, film, and edit; lots of reading to catch up on; a bunch of meetings and gatherings; and my grandpa’s funeral to go to on thursday. i barely slept each night, and i had to squeeze in short naps in my little free time just to prevent my eyes from burning. having teary eyes at the funeral and standing near a pot of burning incense didn’t help much either (at chinese funerals, we burn things like play money so the dead can spend it in heaven).

to top it all off, when i was getting back into the car at the cemetery, the corner of the swinging door left a bloody scratch under my right eye. after i bowed three times to grandpa in his coffin, traditionally i wasn’t supposed to look back at the coffin. so i was opening the door while staring at the ground, and the funeral car doors were heavier and longer than i expected. the top corner scratched my face and left me an apt reminder of the battle i survived this week.

at the end of the week on friday, i fell back on my own “religions”: Kindness, Hope, and Trust. (under religious views on my facebook profile, i have “Kindness, Hope, and Trust are the world’s greatest religions.” one of my friends, a writer for the daily free press, mentioned it in her article about faith last year.)

anyway, on friday, i pointed out a dropped ipod to its owner, i helped a random prospective student and his family find directions, and i helped out a (new?) resident with her mailbox in the mailroom. i usually do stuff like that, but more than ever, this time they were nice reminders that under all the hardships and adversity, there is still meaning in this hustle and bustle we call life.

i Hope things will get better. no, i Trust they will.